My own take would be how do you as the waiter confront the issue. It unfortunately requires perfection on the part of the waiter and his employer and fellow workers.
The comment COULD be innocent. If so, the person needs to become aware of the impression given by the comment. Something on the order of: “I would be glad to get you some more sweet tea. You probably are not aware that calling a Black man ‘boy’ may accidentally give offense, so you might want to avoid using it one future. I will be right back.”
The response should clarify if it was an accidental offense. If it was NOT accidental, get someone else to take care of him.
And the employer and co-workers should back you up.
I do not have the perfect solution, but would want the innocently offensive to learn, and the purposely offensive to be marginalized.
That offensive comment did not come from a place of innocence. The man who made the comment was the "well known owner of another popular local restaurant". He obviously knows better but chose to make the waiter "remember" where he was (SC with its right hire, right to fire state), and who he was waiting on (an crude white man who felt superior). Perhaps I'm a bit more skeptical of the innocence of calling a black man "boy" because a similar thing happened to my grandson while he was at Broadway at The Beach with his white friends.
My own take would be how do you as the waiter confront the issue. It unfortunately requires perfection on the part of the waiter and his employer and fellow workers.
The comment COULD be innocent. If so, the person needs to become aware of the impression given by the comment. Something on the order of: “I would be glad to get you some more sweet tea. You probably are not aware that calling a Black man ‘boy’ may accidentally give offense, so you might want to avoid using it one future. I will be right back.”
The response should clarify if it was an accidental offense. If it was NOT accidental, get someone else to take care of him.
And the employer and co-workers should back you up.
I do not have the perfect solution, but would want the innocently offensive to learn, and the purposely offensive to be marginalized.
That offensive comment did not come from a place of innocence. The man who made the comment was the "well known owner of another popular local restaurant". He obviously knows better but chose to make the waiter "remember" where he was (SC with its right hire, right to fire state), and who he was waiting on (an crude white man who felt superior). Perhaps I'm a bit more skeptical of the innocence of calling a black man "boy" because a similar thing happened to my grandson while he was at Broadway at The Beach with his white friends.